…And Buying Them For Three-And-A-Half Cents!

A clear profit of one cent per egg, Bloggers!  And everybody has a share.

So let’s review, now that every entry’s been catalogued:

It’s voting time.

But FIRST…!  Those of you who submitted entries, and who don’t already know which entry appeared under someone else’s name but was really me, please email me and tell me who you think I was posing as — one guess per customer.

Okay, and that being taken care of…Justin intimated to me that he was a little unclear on the voting, so let me lay it out for you folks.  Of the people who submitted entries for this little old meme of mine, some submitted just one, and others submitted more.  So the first thing we do — “we” meaning the poeple who submitted entries, plus me — the first thing we do is rank our top three favourite submissions, making sure that we don’t nominate any authors more than once.  And my voting in this is weighted the same as everybody else’s voting:  everybody who turned something in gets to vote on their top three, and they can vote for anyone they like, even if they vote for themselves.  But they can’t vote for any author more than once.  And that’s the big rule.

Then those votes go into the pool.

And then, once you’ve made your First Vote…kindly make your Second Vote in the same email!  This means, rank your three favourite entries that were submitted by people who submitted more than one entry apiece…but the big rule here is:  don’t vote for something in the Second Vote, that you already voted for in the First Vote.

Okay.

Now whoever wins the Second Vote — and I’ll let you know who it is! — they get to cast two more votes into the pool of the First Vote.  The only rule being:  they can’t vote for a submission of their own.

And then…

Well, then things get complicated.  Whoever is first to guess whose name I submitted my own entry under then gets one extra vote, that they can cast into the First Vote’s pool for anybody…including themselves.  BUT!  If no one correctly guesses who it was I pretended to be, then the person who kindly let me pretend to be them gets two votes to cast into the First Vote pool…and they can also vote for anybody including themselves.  So…

FIRST!  Email me and tell me who you think I was pretending to be.

SECOND!  Vote for your top three submissions.

THIRD!  Vote for your top three “second efforts”, by the people who submitted more than one entry.

FOURTH!  Wait to see what happens.  Eventually we will have three Winners and one Vulture.  And, man, this is probably way too complicated, right?

But NEVER MIND THAT NOW…!

Because when the smoke clears…honest, it’s gonna have worked out perfectly.

Okay…ready…set

GO!

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5 responses to “…And Buying Them For Three-And-A-Half Cents!

  1. It’s possible I’ve gone completely crazy, isn’t it?

    Everybody in the comments of the two previous memeposts with a name stuck onto an idea, no matter how big or small an idea it is, is eligible to vote; every idea, no matter how small, that’s stuck onto a name is a possible contender.

    Plus Andrew did one on his own blog, so don’t forget him! He’s both eligible to vote, and eligible to win, same as the rest of you…I believe he’s listed in a link on the bottom of the first memepost.

    And thanks again, guys, for letting me send this stuff to good homes.

  2. Whoever is first to guess whose name I submitted my own entry under then gets one extra vote, that they can cast into the First Vote’s pool for anybody…including themselves. BUT! If no one correctly guesses who it was I pretended to be, then the person who kindly let me pretend to be them gets two votes to cast into the First Vote pool…and they can also vote for anybody including themselves

    …unless there are two or more runners on base.

  3. Ha!

    Okay, here are Justin’s votes, just sent to me by email:

    FIRST ROUND:

    1. Phosphorescent Beetles — Matthew
    2. Zerojidu — Jonathan
    3. The Whale — Justin

    SECOND ROUND:

    1. Titan — Jonathan
    2. “Space Stories” — Matthew (ed. – that’s me, just deciding to call it that for want of any more handy name!)
    3. Seventh Son — Harvey

  4. First Round:
    1. Mind Traders of the Milky Way – Kieran
    2. Lighthouse – Justin
    3. Seventh Son – Harvey Jerkwater

    Second Round:
    1. Titan – Jonathan Burns
    2. Airtight Garage – Sean Witzke
    3. The Whale – Justin

    The characters in Dark Matter were named after M*A*S*H characters, only turned inside out, right?

    It looks like a couple of Justin’s votes were misallocated to the wrong category.

  5. Oh, I’m sorry…man, I’ve made this SO NEEDLESSLY COMPLICATED!…no wonder no one’s voting!…but it’s not “First Round = First Post”, it’s “First Round = Three Best”…and the Second Round is picking three runners-up, but those runners-up stories have to be selected from the pool of submitters who offered more than one…!

    Jesus Christ, have I fucked this one up. YOU SEE, ANDREW?! STV IS JUST TOO COMPLICATED…!!!

    (breathes)

    No, it’s not. It isn’t. It isn’t the people choosing who are to blame, it’s the person designing the question. Gotta think like a voter outraged at a referendum…!

    Matthew, Justin, your picks are good as they stand, you haven’t broken any rules…I, however, have made you think there are more rules than there really are, so let me just post an ironic retraction and try to make it look like I meant to do this all along as a meta-joke, and then if you’d like to change anything in your voting please feel free to do so. APOLOGIES FOR THE CONFUSION, and let’s hope for a meta-silver lining.

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