“Maybe I’m Just Too Ugly To Quit…Too Dumb To Know When To Lay Down And Die…!’

Hey, Bloggers:  check out this post today from our old pal Marc.

Now I know some of you have scanners.  Don’t lie.  DON’T TRY TO CONCEAL YOUR THOUGHTS FROM ME


It’s interesting:  Bully’s doing his “365 Days Of Ben Grimm”, and CSBG’s doing “Ten Iconic THING Covers”…but seriously, who cares about THAT?!  I only care about the stuff that made my Dad allow me to buy my first FF comic in the first place, even though the hero was a monster:  the “you might have the power to kill me…but you’ll never have the guts to beat me” stuff.  And of course such is the nature of the superhero comic that if you don’t as a villain have the latter, well then you’ll never have the former either…because Ben Grimm’s cry of “It’s Clobberin’ Time!” doesn’t mean “I’m stronger than you”, but rather it means “you don’t know from suffering“…and they don’t, these villains.  In fact it’s the one thing they can never know:  they don’t know what it’s like to sacrifice. They take shortcuts.  And THAT’S from whence the knockout punch derives its force:  from their shortcuts catching up with them.  Morally, Ben Grimm beats the living daylights out of the villain in one climactic blow…because since this is superhero comics, morality is the ultimate power, and this is the character who’s gone up the ultimate learning curve of morality, and he’s not been allowed to skip any steps…as villains, or more crucially anybody, would wish to do.

And I can think of ten iconic Ben Grimm panels easy — including at least two covers that are NOT “This Man, This Monster”!  CSBG relies pretty awfully on Ron Wilson at the beginning of his career…and it breaks my heart.  It’s like they don’t care.  Or like they’re too young to know.

So scanners, be scanners! Gimme some pictures of Ben Grimm being too ugly to quit.

Sean Kleefeld, this includes you.

Oh, folks:  I drank a ton of beer while composing this email, SO!

If this were a Yahtzee game, consider this my “Chance” score.



3 responses to ““Maybe I’m Just Too Ugly To Quit…Too Dumb To Know When To Lay Down And Die…!’

  1. What? Just ‘cuz I ran an FF website for over a decade, you want to call me out for this?

    OK, I know the scene I want to use and can’t find a copy online at the moment. But I won’t be able to post it for at least 24 hours, so I’m going to use this comment to call dibs.

    FF #40. “Battle of the Baxter Building.” Doc Doom has the Thing pinned to the floor using some super-gravity doohickey that makes Ben so heavy he starts sinking into the reinforced concrete floor. Ben effectively says “Screw you, Doom”, gets up and lumbers over to Doom. Doom is so shocked that he just stands there awestruck, as Ben walks up and crushes his hands inside his gloves.

    I keep that scene in my head when I’m working out.

    My man Kirby never fails to deliver.

  2. Oh, did I mention that, Sea? Hmm…and a very weird night it was, too…!

    The beer in question was Guinness: they say it’s almost like food, but I can tell you there is a certain point where the foodlike “heartiness” of it flags a little bit…

    However, you know…I find that beer has an interesting effect on the way I conceive of blog-posts. I don’t really like the way it affects my blog comments, but for the posts I kind of love it, I always wake up and think “oh, good God, what kind of nutty off-the-cuff thing did I spew out last night, JESUS it’s probably a disaster”…only to find myself concluding something like “now why didn’t I think of that?” when I finally do end up looking at it. I feel like Gallagher, from the old Henry Kuttner stories. So, this one, it’s interesting to me how I compressed the Darkseid thing with the Thing thing — as though my Guinness-addled brain decided that you just can’t talk about one without talking about the other — at the same time I was thinking all about the “as a great man once said” business, and Gary Cooper and Frank Capra and all that jazz. The Thing’s patented battle-cry, the big final put-‘im-away-for-good decisive knockout punch, always underlines the moral dimension of the superhero Big Fight so definitely that it’s no wonder that formula never tires, and really I think it’s a marvellous concision that’s achieved. I really regret seeming to slam the CSBG crowd up above, though, and am wondering if I shouldn’t tweak that a little…after all, there’s nothing wrong with Ron Wilson, and we are all equal nerds together aren’t we? But for me none of those selections are iconic at all, with the obvious exception of FF #51, and I guess once I started wondering why that is then it started attaching to Darkseid and Frank Capra and even Hector Elizondo (!), and once I got onto that it got a little bit runaway-train-like…

    Whaddaya think, I should fix that so it doesn’t sound so snotty, right?

    You know for a moment there I’d forgotten I’d mentioned the beer-drinking, and thought “how does she know?!”…heh-heh…

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