Really, America?

No offence, but have you guys down south considered that possibly you should be a little bit meaner? I mean: crueller. Because, did you really have more than one person who wants to be President declare proudly that they don’t believe in evolution?

I wrote a whole thing about this, but I can’t possibly post it, because it’s just too unkind. But look, you’re the country that’s rebuffed attempts to join church and state the most, of all the nations on Earth. You’ve rebuffed such attempts publicly. You’ve rebuffed such attempts frequently. You’ve rebuffed such attempts politely. Really, the last few years notwithstanding, you’ve got a very good reputation in the family of nations as far as the free speech/religious tolerance thing goes. Maybe even, the best reputation. People respect your integrity. You’ll let any jumped-up jackass have his say. I mean, in my country we’re pretty merciless with our ridicule, when it comes to fringe believers. Quite frankly, we’re dicks. We practically make those people (should they choose to seek public office, that is) wear dunce caps and smocks, and run through the streets at midnight being spanked by brooms. We laugh them off the stage when they get up to speak. We milk them for every laugh they’re worth. It’s like a whole country full of David Spades.

But you! You’re nice. And I respect that, I really do. However…

Is this what the fabled party of Abraham Lincoln has come to?

You should do something about this. Really. You should, I don’t know, send a message or something.

Still pullin’ for ya, America! You’ll make it; you’ve got moxie.


5 responses to “Really, America?

  1. The thing everyone needs to understand about the separation of church and state in America is that we haven’t enshrined it because the American character is or was ever innately secular — in fact quite the opposite, that separation is considered vital precisely because of unchecked American religiosity. We wouldn’t have that principle in our system at all but for the radical free-thinking materialism of Jefferson…and we’ve only kept it this long out of a mutually suspicious detente among all our religious sects and churches. There are so many different branches of Christianity potentially at one another’s throats in this country, and the separation of church and state is the only way each side can be sure the other guy’s church won’t be the one named as the official state religion. Sadly, that may change.

    (N.B.: I use the term “religiosity” because I don’t think actual matters of faith or spirituality are that important to Americans; most people here likely regard their particular church the way the think of their favorite sports team or political party — they always root for their own team, and what that team actually says or does is less important than the simple fact that it’s their team. In other words, it’s brand loyalty.)

    But America is committed most of all to outward displays of piety rather than to the substance of whether or not a politician lives up to his or her professed beliefs. And boy, do they ever have to display that piety! It doesn’t matter if the words are empty, the right words about “God” and “deep faith” must always be said. I don’t believe a declared atheist will ever be elected President in my lifetime, though I’d be happy to be proved wrong about that.

    But yes, we do still have Moxie.

  2. Sigh. Hey, I’m embarrassed too. And you know what is worst? I’m surprised that it was as few as three.

  3. Hey, I’m a fan of science, big big fan.

    But as far as my studies have taken in the decades that I have bothered to look I’ve only been convinced that a belief in evolution is as much as a form of religiosity as a belief in Christ or the Garden of Eden.

    I can’t see it, observe it, repeat it, or test. That means that you are shitting me if I have to believe in it to be a developed person, or educated in the proper ways and means of science, for that matter.

  4. Hey, Blue Spider. I’m intrigued by your claim; please show your work, if you don’t mind, so that I can evaluate it for myself.

    If you don’t want to show your work, that’s fine, of course. But in that eventuality, I hope you’ll excuse me if I’m not persuaded you’re right.


  5. Interestingly, Blue Spider seems to have totally missed the motto of this blog. That kind of just occurred to me, just today. Months later. Funny.

    Also, just to point it out to anyone else who may happen along here one day, as regards natural selection you fucking well CAN “see it, observe it, repeat it, or test.” That much is perfectly elementary, and so — though I dunno what “a developed person” is, and I’m not telling anyone what they have to believe — our friend there is indeed NOT educated in “the proper ways and means of science” if he thinks that you can’t do those things. QED, damn it. And I am not shitting a single living soul.

    Also, I detest folksy rhetorical rabbit-punching of this type. Unmade arguments are without force, and saying that you’ve pursued studies or that you’re a big fan of science can’t alter that fact in the slightest.

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