…Hey, it turns out people don’t like it.
Hola, Bloggers, and especially all of you who participated in the Space-Show Meme! I come before you today to admit that I messed this one up HUGE, and therefore before I have to have the island bombed in order to wipe out my mistakes, let me just say that the voting system I presented to you before sounded like gibberish…!
And that here is the real deal, and if I can still catch your attention on this I would like you please to vote.
In the following manner, in the comments:
To decide which three entrants should get first, second, and third pick of the prizes on offer (prizes detailed in a non-halfassed fashion below), everybody who submitted any entry at all, anyone whose name is beside an idea, is entitled to vote for their Top Three Pitches…out of the total pool represented in both this post’s comments, and this post’s comments. All together, those are the ones you get to pick your Top Three from. Your first vote is worth three points, your second is worth two points, and your third is worth one point. You can vote for yourself in second or third spot if you want to, but not first as that would be unseemly, and naturally you can’t vote for yourself twice.
I’ll vote too, once you’re all done…excluding my own “camouflaged” entry. And unlike the way it went down in the Time-Travel Meme, my vote’ll be just like yours, no extra weighting.
Instead, somebody else will get that extra weighting: two extra votes (worth one point apiece) to cast into the above-mentioned Prize Round, for whichever entry or entries they please except their own, once everybody including me has voted their Top Three.
And to determine who this person will be, this person with the “swing votes” (if you will), we’ll all take the bunch of people who submitted more than one proposal, and vote another “top three” from just their entries…but of course you can’t pick a pitch for this “top three”, that you already picked for the Top Three. So whatever pitches are left over from the double-submitters, that you didn’t already vote for…you rank them in a top-three order. But unlike the Prize Round, in this round — the “Swing” Round — you can’t vote for yourself.
I know, it’s still ridiculously complicated. But to boil it down, you first vote for the Top Three of what submissions you like the best…then for the “top three” of the extra submissions you like the best. And you can vote for yourself in the first Three, but you can’t vote for yourself in the second “three”.
Oh God, Yossarian, it’s all going wrong…it’s a total disaster…
Then, the final note: you email me and guess whose submission was really mine under a false name. And I will give you a clue: “I” am one of the people who made more than one pitch.
And the first person to guess right, wins an extra one-point vote to cast in the Prize Round, for anybody including themselves…
…But if nobody guesses right, the person who let me post under their name gets two one-point votes to cast in the Prize Round for anybody except themselves.
But then they get their pick of whatever prizes are left over, just as if they were a fourth winner….
And, damn, it’s not going to work, I know it…
…But if it did work, here’s what it would look like, in the comments below:
“PERSON WHO SUBMITTED ENTRY IN EITHER POST:
Prize Round: out of both posts, my favourite entries are
1. Favourite Entry (3 points)
2. Second-Favourite Entry (2 points)
3. Third-Favourite Entry (1 point)
“Swing” Round: out of both posts, my favourite additional submissions by an entrant are:
1. Favourite Additional Entry (3 points)
2. Second-Favourite Additional Entry (2 points)
3. Third-Favourite Additional Entry (1 point)
And now pardon me while I email Plok with my guess at who he was pretending to be.”
And then that would be totally fine, guys!
And now: the Prizes.
(This supersedes the Prize Packs I was talking about in earlier posts, and may seem to be a little bit like old Marvel subscription forms, or possibly like going to an old-style “Chinese-Canadian Cuisine” restaurant…Marvel, j’accuse! Vous etes un racist!)
First, pick one from:
Hard Boiled, by Frank Miller and Geoff Darrow; The Spirit: Vol. I, by Darwyn Cooke, J. Bone, and Dave Stewart
Eighth Annual Edition Of The Worst From MAD, by the Usual Gang Of Idiots (reprint); National Lampoon Sunday Newspaper Parody (seq. to 1964 Yearbook), by Various
Beanworld: Book One and Beanworld: Book Four, by Larry Marder (Beanworld Press); Hellboy: The Wild Hunt #8 of 8, by Mike Mignola and Duncan Fegredo; Sandman: The Dream Hunters #3, by Neil Gaiman and P. Craig Russell
The Goon: Nothin’ But Misery, by Eric Powell; buncha Panic reissues, by Various
Second, pick two from:
MAD #137 (Bob and Carol and Ted and Alice parody)
MAD #155 (Godfather parody)
MAD #157 (Planet Of The Apes parody)
MAD #159 (A Clockwork Orange parody)
MAD #160 (“horizontal hold”)
MAD #166 (“finger” issue)
MAD #170 (Exorcist parody)
MAD #215 (Apocalypse Now parody)
[All MADs in this List are originals from '71 to '80, bagged and boarded and in what I think is pretty darn good condition; a MAD novelty item or book may be included with selection, slightly slimmer chance a non-MAD novelty item or book may be included with selection but that's the chance you take]
Third, accept or decline one of the following Mystery Get-Rid-Of-Loads-Of-Crappy-Stuff Packages named after some comics-blogging friends of ours:
The Fortress Keeper
The Harvey Jerkwater
The Andrew Hickey
The Sean Witzke (VCR required)
And if those five people so-named can just describe their favourite sandwiches here? Then who knows what unknown good may come of it in the future.
…Well, I hope to God that was clearer than the last poorly-phrased-referendum-question version, Bloggers…tell me, was it clear? Did I screw up yet again?
Do I have to call for the air strike, Yossarian? JUST EAT THE COTTON, DAMN YOU…! PRETEND IT’S DELICIOUS…!
Sigh, if it wasn’t clear this time, it will once again be my fault…and I’ll probably have to find another way to get rid of this absurdly-accumulating excellent stuff that’s all around me these days.
And everybody has a share, you know?
Uh…say, everybody? Where you gone, man…?
Peace and no harm, Bloggers!
And over and out.